Archive | November, 2010

Life Lesson #2

19 Nov

Nicole,

This is an important lesson I hope you learn early.  I learned it a little late, but still glad I did.

Know when to keep your mouth shut.

I don’t know why people think being opinionated is a highly-desirable trait. It is not.  Remember this- you don’t have to let every single opinion that forms in your head spill out of your mouth. It takes more strength to keep your mouth shut and to keep your cool than it is to talk. People will say stupid things; that is their problem, not yours.

Everyone has opinions. Some people have opinions they pull out of their ass and are not based on facts. Sure, you are entitled to your own opinions, baby. It doesn’t mean you always have to let others know what they are. It’s also possible you think you are right when you are not.

One more thing, you will have prejudices for sure, I hope I raise you knowing that just because you think a certain way about certain things, it doesn’t mean you will allow your prejudices to reign supreme. Keep your prejudices to yourself. Work a way to tame them. Keep your mouth shut. When you start thinking bad thoughts, bite your tongue.

Here’s another reason you should know when to shut up– there’s no winning an argument with a fool. Sometimes it’s enough that you know you are right, you don’t have to win all arguments. Do not allow your ass to get dragged into a stupid argument with someone who is unreasonable. Let the fool remain a fool.  Sometimes all you need to do is to speak your mind once. Do not attempt to change a mind that’s already dead set on something. You’re just looking for a fight.

People know what they know. People like what they like. They don’t have to like what you like; you don’t have to like what they do.

In the next letter, I’ll tell you life lesson #3 (Be Teflon) which is connected to this lesson. I’ll explain next time. I love you.

Mama

Advertisements

Museo Pambata Toy Drive

9 Nov

Museo Pambata Toy Drive

How We Handle Money

8 Nov

I started Mommy and Money in 2007 as a personal finance blog. Along the way it had become more of a mommy blog than a money blog.  Then in 2009, I just deleted the website because I wasn’t really updating it anymore. But then earlier this year I realized I really need a mommy blog because that’s who I am – I am a mommy- and so I put this site back up. This week I have decided to bring back the ‘money’ aspect of the blog.

 

Money Talk

Over dinner last week, a friend asked me who pays for what in our home, and how Jay and I came up with the arrangement. I couldn’t answer the question because it wasn’t like Jay and I actually sat down to discuss our expenses. Many financial advisers tell couples to sit down and discuss money early on in the marriage. We’ve never really had to.

We go by this simple guideline: whoever has money, pays.

I guess it’s easy for us because it’s not like we’re swimming in money or that there is a great lack of it. We have enough. And after getting buried in credit card debt years ago, we’ve actually learned to live within our means.

Right now Jay takes care of most of our household expenses. That’s because he earns more than I do. When I need money and I don’t have any, I can even ask him for some. And he gives me money (I know there are people who feel bad about giving their partners money). If there will ever come a time I would need to step up and find a job outside the home to take care of this family, I will just have to do it. It’s really simple- we take care of each other.

I am proud to say that in the almost 15 years that Jay and I have been together, we have NEVER had a fight about money. Ever.

I think the reason we don’t fight about money is that we don’t have ridiculous views about it. We don’t feel like we have to hold on to money too tightly or that we have to spend it like there’s tomorrow. We certainly don’t have opposing views about money. We’re totally on the same page when it comes to money and all the other major stuff that affect the lives of couples. We spend money on things we need. We, uhm, self-regulate when it comes to expenses for stuff we only want.  I trust he won’t blow his income on some ridiculous toy or stuff we don’t need. He trusts I won’t spend our money on shopping sprees we can’t afford. We don’t buy a lot of clothes or shoes. We enjoy thrifting though.

Majority of our money go to Nicole’s expenses. If it’s for Nicole’s sake and if we have money for it, then we don’t need to have a lengthy discussion about it. Do we have money to send her to a private school? OK, then she goes to private school. Can we afford ballet classes for her? Yes. OK, she has to do ballet. Last summer they had a recital and because we had no money to pay for the recital, we didn’t even have to agonize over the decision- she just had to skip it.

Maybe little by little I’ll discuss money matters on this blog just to show how we’ve managed to NOT fight about money all these years.

There is this situation that’s coming up in a few months, and it will be a very good test regarding our feelings about money, but because my husband does not feel comfortable discussing it, I’m shutting my pie hole. I will probably discuss it when it’s all over so we can see what lessons we’ve learned.

Johnson’s Baby Shower

4 Nov

Johnson’s threw a baby shower for three expectant moms– Ria Tanjuatco Trillo, Lexi Schulze and Marielle Santos Po at the Hotel Intercontinental Manila yesterday, and invited media and mommy bloggers to the event.

Celebrity Mommies Sharing Their Pregnancy Stories

The event started with lunch. I didn’t eat too much food cause I wanted to eat lots of desserts 😛

Desserts on the Buffet Table (this wasn't my plate! LOL. defensive :-P)

It was a short and sweet event; the best part was I met a lot of awesome mommy bloggers with the cutest babies!

The event ended with a fun baby bath game (using baby dolls of course).

Baby Bath Game

I didn’t have a baby shower when I was pregnant with Nicole and it was my first time to attend a shower. I had fun 🙂

Here’s the good news: three lucky women can have their own baby shower c/o Johnson’s.  Catering, venue and goodies will be sponsored by Johnson’s, and the event will also be featured on the Lifestyle Network. Winner will also receive 1 year’s supply of Johnson’s products and a maternity photoshoot and baby photoshoot.

If you know anyone who is pregnant, you can nominate her to Johnson’s Baby World of Firsts . Just click on the “Baby Showers” tab on Johnson’s Baby World of Firsts Facebook page to see the complete mechanics and to submit a nomination for the promo.

 

Johnson's Baby Shower Promo

Life Lesson For Girls #1

2 Nov

A few years ago, a  friend suggested I blog about  life/love lessons so that Nicole can read about them when she grows up. I think I may have blogged about love lesson #1 in the past ( I can’t remember anymore) but because today I read a post online that made me remember this very important tip for girls, I am blogging about it.

Here’s lesson #1, this is important not just for little girls, I know some women could use this lesson– unless a boy tells you he loves you, you do NOT assume anything. It’s really simple, If he tells you nothing, you always think there’s NOTHING there.  This will save you from a lot of heartaches and even embarrassment. It doesn’t matter if the boy takes you home, calls you every single day, holds your hands, kisses your forehead, worries about you when you are sick, etc. If he doesn’t tell you he loves you, you do NOT make a move.  You pray to God he gets the courage to actually tell you he loves you  is what you do, nothing else 😀

I know it’s hard. Everyday, you’ll feel like you’re in a battle to stop your chest from exploding. There will be many points in your life when you’ll rationalize- your heart wants what it wants.  But it would suck a lot more if you find out the guy actually makes a million other girls feel special. Or that the guy likes you, but does not love you, at least not enough for him to face his fears and actually tell you.

Maybe one day, I will blog about this again. Maybe I’ll use better words to explain, but for now, you’ll have to trust me on this- unless a boy tells you he loves you, the smart thing to do is think he does not.